April 16th, 2004

WotD: Cockneypalooza II - Cockney Harder

Today we have a whole raft of cockney rhyming slang in honour of poshcat's birthday.

Once again all the following slang words are absolutely genuine

So with out further ado:
Cobblers' awls = balls or 'bollocks' (i.e. testicles)
[usually meant in the sense of 'rubbish']
eg: "You're talking a load of cobblers"

Dickie bird = word
eg: I haven't heard a dickie from Jane since she went on holiday

Jack Jones = alone
eg: "On my Jack" = "On my own"

loaf of bread = head
eg: Stop being a plonker … use your loaf

Mutt and Jeff = deaf
(named after two early 20th century comic strip characters)
eg: I'm getting a bit mutton in me old age

Syrup of figs = wig(s)
eg: Sean Connery was wearing a syrup in his last film

Tomfoolery = jewellery
(can be shortened to tom)
eg: Becks bought Posh a nice bit of tomfoolery to apologise about the affair

Treacle tart = sweetheart
As favoured on 'Eastenders' as a greeting for ladies.
eg: Wotcha Treacle!

Barney Rubble - Trouble

Boat Race - Face
(after the Oxford and Cambridge University boat race)
eg: Look at the miserable boat on her!

Bubble Bath - Laugh
eg: You're having a bubble, ain’t yer?

Brown bread = dead

China Plate - Mate
eg: Hello me old china

Dog and Bone - Phone

Half-Inch - Pinch (as in steal)
eg: Fred 'alf-inched me last fag

Plates of Meat - Feet

Scooby Doo - Clue
eg: He ain't got a scooby what to do next

And finally, runs away ducking for cover
Septic tank = Yank (slang for an American)

Why use one word when you can use three or four ?